The Comeback
5/29/24 9:59pm
He holds me closely. Each time I feel like I am about to break, God seamlessly streamlines all the pieces of my life story, those He delicately and intentionally crafted before I was born, together into something more beautiful than I could have imagined. I have learned and been challenged in what it means to be content no matter the circumstances. I have faced a LOT. And I’m only 29 years old.
The past six months have been the most challenging of my life. I feel like I have lost many parts of who I was. Thankfully though, she—whoever she was—is still with me. Somewhere, she exists. The big question on my mind is related to my career and whether the path I’ve worked so hard for is the path God has for me. There seems to be so much working against it. But maybe that’s why I must pursue it. After all, they say anything worth having is worth fighting for.
And I’m fighting.
Some days, it feels like I’m losing. But if I take in to account all the moments of victory and joy God has written into my story, it feels like I’ve never lost, and that I never can. It feels like what I need to succeed is within me and is there whenever I need a reminder of who I am and who I was created to be. More importantly, whenever I need a reminder of Whose I am, I’ll remember that I am more than a conqueror. I ought to not ever forget that. This is a comeback story.
“What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?”
Romans 8:31
I’m Still Standing
2/23/2025 8:18pm
It is now 2025. You wouldn’t believe the things that I have faced since I last wrote for the blog. Thoughtful Gems will always be very special to me. I’ll always proclaim how grateful I am to have this space to share my story.
I can easily say 2024 was the most challenging year of my life. A lot of people say things like this around the end of every year, but I know for certain that this statement carries more weight for me than this world will ever truly know. In one year, my life turned completely upside down.
I spent the year in and out of psychiatry units, and not as just a medical student. I became the patient I have been working so diligently to help someday as a physician. As a result, my perspective has expanded and is forever changed. There’s now a new meaning to the idea that I’ve seen the world. And, someday, I will share the full story in a memoir. I’ve seen so much, and it makes me even more inspired to keep going on this journey.
You guessed it. I am still studying for my licensing exam. But things are different this time. This time, I‘m claiming victory and not accepting failure. Failure is no longer part of my story going forward. In fact, God said there would be no more failure. He has made good on this promise. I am almost there. I’m still standing, and I will pass.
“For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases Him.”
Philippians 2:13
Telling the Story
As for my time as a medical student/psychiatry patient, that’s a long story for a future time. As vulnerable as this makes me, I am open to sharing because I feel called to do so. I have always known my testimony was never just for me. My story is meant to be shared. So, I must be brave. I must not remain silent.
For me, writing is a freeing experience. So is any form of storytelling. I talk about the meaning and impact of sharing stories in my Kevin MD post “Failure is not the end: Creating space for grace in the medical field”. Stories of failure and triumph over failure are worthy to be told. Our stories are worth telling to those willing to listen. You never know who you may inspire.
Besides, art outlives us all. I don’t mean to sound melancholy, but none of us will be here forever. Why not find a way to make your story count? It matters because you lived it. It lives on because you share it.
An old mentor once said, “Writing is having power. It’s having influence. It’s shaping minds. It’s a tool of having a voice. If you were to die tomorrow, what would you want to say?” I think this could be applied to many creative gifts.
To answer the question, I would want to share my story. So, while I am here, if given the chance, I will.
Considering the severity of the spiritual circumstances I was facing, my public speaking skills didn’t shine through as I had hoped in this interview. However, I am grateful for this opportunity and I am glad to share this part of my story. Making it to the interview at all was a miracle. This was a blessing in the midst of a very harsh wave of demonic oppression I was facing. As per usual, I persevered. (Much more on this at a later time.)
A peak at what the past season of my life looked like:
God did incredible things in my life during what was easily the most tragic season of it. After many weeks of spiritual sickness and a month in the hospital at the start of 2024, things started to look up.
I traveled to Rome, Italy to complete a global health International Research Training Seminar in Child and Adolescent Psychiatry. I went to Rio de Janeiro, Brazil to attend a global health conference for the International Alliance of Child and Adolescent Psychiatrists and Allied Professions. I completed a certificate program in Media and Medicine: How to Tell Stories That Make a Difference through Harvard Medical School. And later in the year I got my very first professional publication in health journalism, and later interview, with social media’s leading voice, KevinMD.
Talk about an Anchor in a storm, my God is incredible.
“Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.”
1 Peter 4:10
Even though things took an unfortunate turn later in the year, I still have reason to give God praise. He called me to a second baptism. And after a totaled car (yes, another major car accident y’all), several hospitalizations, and a missed licensing exam in the months thereafter, I still have hope. I still have a life. I still have my life. And for that, I am eternally grateful.
More soon. ♥
What story are you willing to share?