I’m adapting to a wellness-driven lifestyle, but I’m still human. I’ve been hesitant to write. Partially because I’ve been writing a lot more privately than I have been publicly. And partially because the reason for that writing has been kind of…intense.

This has undoubtedly been the most eye-opening year of my entire life.

This game changer of a year has been emotionally and spiritually transformative in all the best ways. And in all the hard ways. I’ve experienced the highest of highs and some of the lowest lows. My soul found spaces to exist that I didn’t know were attainable. It’s been more than a rollercoaster; it’s been divine intervention on my entire existence. And that existence is full of faith and triumph; hardship and perseverance; freedom and discipline; contentment and ambition; peace and spiritual expansion. And growth. Always. 

I cannot gloss over the tests of faith and endurance that weave themselves into so many parts of my nonlinear story. Because faith itself is my story. I believe it’s all our stories, ultimately. And we’ve got freedom and autonomy in how we choose to navigate that journey.

Human nature leads us to spend considerable time focusing on previous chapters of our lives, or on what we hope to attain in future ones. It creeps up when we least expect it and encourages us to ruminate on the hardest of character-building chapters, rather than allowing our thoughts to rest in total peace and confidence that every challenge and plot twist in our path is purposeful and intentional in leading us to where we were always meant to be. It’s in our nature to fret about the future, rather than to trust that all we hope for is already on its way (or already here). Society enables our anxiety daily, sending a reliable signal to stress with each turning page, every single day of our lives.

But just because this is our nature doesn’t mean we are bound to it. We have say in how we choose to voyage through our lives.

Those who master the art of dancing along the pages of life, trusting that the story is already written, enjoy the pages as they come, while those who entrust themselves with the pen entirely endure the ongoing pressure that comes with that.

Its a daily choice to embrace that I am not the Author, but rather the narrator, of my story. And since I also double as the protagonist in that story, living fully in faith and freedom is the goal. Pursuing that goal as I turn the pages of my life story makes my job as both the narrator and protagonist of my story more enjoyable.

Personally, I’ve discovered that the outward expression of my inner world is a critical means to that end. Thoughtful Gems on all platforms is a space to expand in a world that often confines the most critical parts of my personality, cognition and spiritual wiring. Words allow the most extroverted parts of my introspective spirit to connect with the world, setting some of my most intricate thoughts free and sending intimate parts of my personal testimony out into the universe to reach to whoever it was designed to touch.

Taking a deep dive into uncovering what brings my spirit the most fulfillment and what unsettles it has been one of the most worthwhile time investments I’ve ever made. The memories I’ve made this year have taught me a lot about myself, the world around me and the people in it. I’ve also experienced the greatest intimacy with God I’ve ever known. The process of self-discovery is both ongoing life changing.

A sermon revealed to me recently that God works with us when He assigns us a task. Who I am becoming is the overarching assignment. And self-work is the premise for the course at hand. He is working with me, and I am working for Him.  

And the scariest part about it all is that I have no idea what I am doing. Many of the extraordinary things that happen in my life hardly ever make sense. But, I’ve learned to be okay with that. I determined a long time ago that it all has purpose, both the good and the bad. And so, I choose to live purposefully and at peace with whatever does or doesn’t come my way as best I can. In my adult life, especially over the past half decade, this mental framework has brought me an insurmountable level of peace.

I took a short hiatus from the blog to keep my mental wellbeing in check. But I’ve returned to my safe space, as I always have, and always will. I’m learning some things, releasing some things and embracing some things in this season of my life. And I love what I’m discovering in the process. Moreover, I love who I’m becoming in the process.

Somehow, I’ve managed to succeed at forming what I always dreamed would become an outward expression of my inner world. And I’m grateful for this space where my thoughts can roam free, my mind can expand and my heart can overflow. I am being stretched in my capacity, in all areas, more than ever before. And I’m no longer fighting it. I’m leaning into it, fully. And since I am expanding, Thoughtful Gems too must expand.

Thoughtful Gems is entering into a new season.

And, by God’s grace and divine protection, so am I. ♡